Farewell to Transient Tresses

A dear friend of mine cut his hair. Silly, says you. Heartbreaking and miraculous, says I.

My friend has had long hair since about third grade. When I met him in fifth grade, I immediately took him to be a girl. A hard-core tomboy, perhaps. So, it was to my greatest puzzlement when I saw his namecard in the boys' bathroom envelope (if you needed to use the bathroom, you put your card in the envelope for your gender's bathroom and then went). I asked one of my new friends, a girl with also unusually long hair that has never been cut, if I should move the card to the girls' bathroom envelope. Obviously, she had accidentally put it in the boys' one.

My friend giggled, and explained that this "girl" was actually a boy. Whoops.

He was so obviously a boy. A techie with a great sense of humor and a ferocious temper; there wasn't a drop of femininity in him. We became fast friends, and remain so to this day.

In sixth grade, we manned sword-fighting forts together. In seventh grade, we all raised eyebrows as he developed a hilarious perverted sense of humor, and started the fads of "your mom" and "that's what she said" and, his personal, and completely original, favorite "J-harst!" (Just Had A really Sick Thought).

All along, that hair had been his defining feature and his greatest enemy. He often started introductions with the words, "If you're wondering, I'm a boy." He battled along with us long-haired girls with brushing it out every morning, empathized with us as to the need for conditioner, and always wore his hair down.

Finally, at the beginning of this year, he announced that he intended to cut it before graduation. We all exclaimed that it was a great idea, voiced premature remorse at the loss of his long hair, and forgot about it. So, at our school's fortieth anniversary celebration on Saturday, I happened to see a girl in my class walking towards me with a short, and also short-haired boy in tow. he was wearing reflective aviators and swaggering slightly. I decided he must be some new boyfriend, and waved politely.

It was only after they had passed by that a friend walking with me exclaimed, "That's ARI!"

It was. I almost cried. All his hair, gone. His defining feature. Gone.

But, change must come. He is still the same Ari. Just with shorter hair.

So, this is a eulogy and a celebration in honor of his lost tresses. Spaghetti Carbonara can be eaten for comfort or celebration or sadness. He can eat it in romantic candlelight with whatever girls he attracts in high school with his aviators and new short hair. I dedicate this to Ari.


SPAGHETTI CARBONARA
(Adapted from Martha Stewart)

Serves 3

1/2 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
10 ounces pancetta, chopped roughly
1/2 pound spaghetti
1/2 cup heavy cream, plus more if needed
1 large egg yolk (2 can also be used, if you want to make the dish richer)
1 cup grated Parmesan cheese, plus more for garnish
1/8 teaspoon freshly ground pepper

Bring a large saucepan of water to the boil. Heat a medium skilled over medium heat. Add the olive oil and pancetta to skillet, and cook until pancetta is browned, 7 to 10 minutes. Remove skilled from heat, and keep warm.

Cook spaghetti in boiling water until al dente, about 8 minutes. While spaghetti is cooking, whisk cream, egg yolk, Parmesan, salt, and pepper in a medium bowl until combined. Drain pasta, and return to saucepan. Immediately stir in egg-and-cheese mixture until well combined. Add warm pancetta and fat from pan. Toss well. This sauce with additional cream if necessary. Serve immediately, garnished with grated Parmesan cheese.